Sunday, October 14, 2012

Identity

I am a published author. I have always wanted to say that!  (-;  
http://stealingtimemag.com/


The kickstarter was successful and the magazine was funded, and I decided to bite the bullet and try to write something with all I had. I decided to commit to one piece that I would be willing to polish and achingly revise and even "let go of" so that I could accept feedback to make this as good as I could.  With some of that assistance of editing, they accepted my piece and I am happy that I "tried".  I wanted to see if I could..  and childlike I feel in the success, "I did it!"  

On my bucketlist is to write at least one book, but now that I really think about it, it would actually be my dream to do this for my career, going back to my roots of when I was eight and wrote my own "book of my life"  inspired by Laura Ingalls Wilder.  (does that sound cliche?)  How do I articulate that writing has always been how I best articulate myself and make sense of the random thoughts floating in an out of my brain. In person, I stumble upon my words, shyness sometimes overcomes me.  (still) 

And I actually believe that I am insightful enough about life..  (Gardner's--"Intrapersonal" in my way of processing the world to do this.. (on a good day)  

Still, time is extremely limited right now.  I have two windows in my day, nap time, and after the kids are asleep.  That last window is not always a guarantee.  (I must also put time into my relationship with my husband and sometimes kids do not want to go to sleep)  The last few months, I have used that window to knit which has been such great therapy/and self-esteem building for me.  It is hard to put it aside to do anything else.

I have been neglectful of my blog, mainly because I have been knitting, and now, I am not entirely happy submitting mediocre posts (I have had a taste of creating something "attemptedly" artful.)  Even now, I feel that I am writing something mediocre.  I want to write something better than this!  

Still, I have to go back to writing each day, exercising..If I do not, my writing brain turns to moosh.  

Yet, again, this blog may be shifting and morphing into something new.  


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